october reading wrap
in which i throw off my malaise and read scary things
October was an interesting month. Of course, I read my horror and my thrillers, but I admit my mind was preoccupied with horrors more pressing—the horrors of colonialism. It is difficult to read about ghosts and specters and demons when one is bearing to witness to massacres, blackouts, bombings, and several genocides. Words printed on paper feel much less scary than the reality of rubble, blood and white supremacy.
I have read through horrors before. In 2012 and 2014, after the murders of Trayvon Martin and Mike Brown respectively, I managed to do school work even as I grappled with my humanity (and white people’s refusal to admit I had any, as a Black person). In 2020, when the world discovered for the millionth time the cruelty of the police, I read and watched, and yet this time—I don’t know what it is this time. The pandemic and cost of living, the collapse of American empire (yay!) coinciding with multiple genocides (Palestine, Sudan, Congo, Tigray, and I believe, Armenia?) have all created a complete and total block.
I’ll admit that I have fallen into the trap of despair. For thirty of the past forty-five days, I’ve been deeply self-centered and selfish in my doom, wallowing in sadness. It’s truly only through the prodding and affectionate shoving of my dear friends that I’ve come to realize that nothing is gained from me lying in bed. I have to move; I have to act.
Don’t get me wrong! This isn’t one of those brainless ‘Choose joy! Log off! Prioritize your wellness!’ things—this is me coming to terms that the world spins forward. Announcements of anguish are lip service. My job as an artist and an author is to share and uplift the voices of Palestinian people; my job is to connect Black feelings of pain and hope to those of the people in Palestine and Sudan and Congo. My job is to read and to learn, to expand my mind and break the useless shell of doomerism to reveal the meaty, juicy insides of hope, promise and sweet future.
All this to say—my October reading wrap is very much lax in terms of revolutionary and educative reading. Expect bigger-brained, more esoteric and improving literature in the November wrap. I literally cannot wait to gush at your guys about The Delectable Negro.
DEVIL HOUSE by John Darnielle / fiction, crime, literary + ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: A story is always true even when it’s not …Damn.
Additional Notes: Not my most verbose of reviews, but it is accurate. This was a book about an author writing a true crime story about an adult video store in the 80s. The original story positioned and published by the media in the 80s was one of satanic rituals and gory violence, while the real story was much more complex and convoluted, about belonging and gentrification and othering. It was a very good book, and I really like Darnielle’s prose. Would definitely read again.
A FASHIONABLE INDULGENCE by KJ Charles / fiction, historical, lgbtq, romance + ⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: Cute!
Additional Notes: I’ve read another KJ Charles story before, one about a seller of illegal books and I really enjoyed that, so I expected to enjoy this one as well. I think, unfortunately for me, I’m at a place in my politics where I can’t read romances that push aristocratic fascism and try to do a ‘both sides’ thing when it’s like, British tyranny versus the commonfolk that oppose them. I think I’m really over historical romances that use revolutionary violence as a backdrop to bland, passionless sex. The other book was good though, I’m just not cut out for this flavor of romance.
A GAME OF THRONES by George R.R. Martin / fiction, fantasy + ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: Oh my god...wait, no I get it now. I really get it, my mind is wide open to it. I need to get the next audiobook PRONTO!
On a more serious note, I can understand how this became such a phenomenon. I was nearly in tears when Ned died, and everything that happens to Sansa and Arya feels SO big to me. I'm sitting here worried over Bran and Jon, worried for Catelyn, worried for EVERYONE truly.
I have my icks and such, but the book is so good I'm happy to push through!
Also, a drinking game where you take a sip every time the reader says the names in a radically different way each time, or every time they say the title of the book or warn about winter coming, you'd be DEAD.
Additional Notes: I get it…I’m so sorry to every GoT fan I’ve made fun of, to every nerd that I’ve patronized for being into this book series. I get it, I get it and I need to listen to the rest of the series, thank you. This was iconic. This was near perfection (we don’t talk about Dany’s chapters, thank you, ew). I would lay down my life for the Starks, for Jon, for Tyrion, for Sam, I adore this book. Yeah, I get it now.
JAWBONE by Monica Ojeda / fiction, horror + ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: I swear Ojeda wrote this for meeeeeeee. Anxious, horror-obsessed teenagers, a disturbing White God, mother-daughter horror, violent homoeroticism, a paranoid teacher and a damn crocodile jawbone, I’m GAGGED! Need a physical copy to mark up PRONTO
This is one of those books you desperately need a physical copy for because you need to like, hold the words in your hands. I need to feel the paper and the energy of the print to match the energy of the words in my head, you know? Such a good book, and I think we need to be writing way more novels about the psychosexual insanity of teenage girls. I remember myself as a wee lass…I probably needed to be institutionalized, and even all the wildness in me couldn’t come close to whatever these girls were up to. Love it, would recommend.
UPLIFT THE RACE: THE CONSTRUCTION OF SCHOOL DAZE by Lisa Jones, Spike Lee / nonfiction, art
Additional Notes: No review added (or really needed!) I just wanted to read this book about the making of School Daze because it’s one of my favorite Spike Lee movies. Every story from Fishburne and Esposito are like gold to me.
FROM HELL by Alan Moore, Eddie Cambell / fiction, comics, horror + ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: A horrifying treatise on sensationalism, misogyny and femicide, and way that the whims of power men influence every aspect of society.
Even when I was in my more morbid phase as a teenager, I was never enthralled with Jack the Ripper, and as I grew, I just thought it was sad and weird that they never learned who did it. Of course, understanding that these were sex workers, women deemed to the lowest of the low, it's not surprising
This piece of historical fiction presents theories of a bloodthirsty doctor with a mind for ancient rituals, a secret royal baby and the crowd's desperation to clean up its scandal, even at the expense of its citizens, and scapegoats sacrificed for the "Good of england"...
Additional Notes: Absolutely mindblowing piece of work. There’s so much to be said about violence against women, about how journalism and media and government institutions are used to suppress all acts of disobedience, and we could say it, if we had time for it.
MO’ BETTER BLUES by Spike Lee, Lisa Jones / nonfiction, script + ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Additional Notes: Another behind the scenes banger. I wish he still did these books because I’d like to know his thinking behind Blackkklansman and Bamboozled.
LAKEWOOD by Megan Giddings / fiction, dystopian, horror, science fiction + ⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: Definitely a well-written and intriguing novel. I love anything that plays with the inherent horror of antiblackness, the apocalyptic nature of racism. There were parts here and there where I wished the book dug a little deeper, but overall, very good horror!
Additional Notes: I know what I said above, and I agree with me, but it was boring. You would think a horror novel about medical anti-Blackness and about how white people have used Black bodies as petri dishes would be a lot more interesting and shocking, but it was kind of dull. You can definitely tell it was one of those books written after Get Out, a racial horror meant to appeal to a different audience. It could’ve gone further; it could’ve dug deeper. As it stands, it’s just mid. Like, there are parts that are beautiful and that I really enjoyed, but all in all, meh.
LENT: A NOVEL OF MANY RETURNS by Jo Walton / fiction, fantasy, historical + ⭐⭐⭐⭐ (4.5)
Storygraph Review: It was about the sin of pride literally this whole time… WIG, I want a physical copy
Additional Notes: Oh, I loved this! This was one of my impromptu, ‘glasses-off’ reads, like one of those books I read at night to get to sleep, but it kept me up. What a book! What a novel about religion and spirituality and like, self-discovery. Like, you tell me there’s a book about a monk whose actually a fallen angel and whose soul is damned trying to get into heaven, and I’m going to be there, and you need to be there too. Get into Lent, get into Jo Walton.
And yes, it was about the sin of pride, thinking he was the only way out and through…Bitch. Delicious.
UZUMAKI by Junji Ito / fiction, horror, manga + ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: Girl help! I’m trapped in the fucking spiral!
Additional Notes: Can we hear a little commotion for one of the greatest pieces of horror maybe ever? Can we make some noise for Junji Ito and his twisted, spiraling visions of horror? Can we make some noise for infected land, land plagued by spirals and curses that can never be broken, only temporarily sated? Can we? Also, can we talk about the mesmerism/attention-seeking aspect of the book, like the spiral wasn’t just physical, it existed inside of people, it twisted them up, it made them dizzy, oh baby!
ROOM by Emma Donoghue / fiction, contemporary, literary, thriller + ⭐⭐⭐⭐( 4.75)
Storygraph Review: Sometimes it’s nice to cry!
Additional Notes: I don’t care how many times I read this book (or watch the movie) I’m going to cry, I’m going to feel really big feelings about a stolen life and stolen youth, and I’m going to feel crushed by Jack discovering the world.
NOBODY, SOMEBODY, ANYBODY by Kelly McClorey / fiction, contemporary, literary + ⭐⭐⭐
Storygraph Review: Sure! Contemporary never does anything for me tho
Additional Notes: Though, really, it was more like a two-star? I remember when I first saw the cover at Barnes & Noble, I was intrigued and downloaded it through … other venues, and it’s been sitting on my TBR forever. Finally got around to reading it, and it’s nothing! It’s not even air. It suffers from ‘Contemporary Fiction Written by a Self-Aware White Woman’ Disease, which is maybe one of the worst diseases a contemporary novel can have. Stop looking your audience in the eye! Stop smirking at the camera! Transport me, damn it!
THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE by Shirley Jackson / fiction, classics, horror, literary + ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐(DUH!)
Storygraph Review: Finally a book with rep for closeted autistic women with tumultuous relationships with their mothers and themselves who have vague psychic powers, and are then thrust into a haunted, hungry house that preys on their neediness and swallows them whole, making it so they CAN'T leave the house, they can't they can't, they've surrended to the house, they never wanted a self anywhere and now they're air. Finally!
Additional Notes: Now, be serious. Did you really think I was going to make it through a Halloween season without reading something by Shirley Jackson? Did you think I would step foot outside of the black-and-orange without putting my hand to thee horror book of all time? There’s not even anything to get in to. You just need to read it, over and over, and really let the sickness of Hill House pour into you. Let it call you home. Let it howl at you, let the walls wail and weep your name, and maybe fall into trances and become home with Hill House, and you’ll feel better because you are as sick as the sick land.